In a recent episode of the Call With Dads podcast, hosts E.a. Maynard and Mr. Pancakes sat down with Pastor Ron Merritt of New Hope Wayne, Ohio, for a heartfelt conversation about fatherhood, faith, and navigating the challenges of raising kids in today’s world. With decades of experience as a pastor, father, and grandfather, Pastor Ron shared timeless insights that resonate deeply with dads striving to lead their families with purpose and conviction. Here’s a look at the key takeaways for fathers looking to build strong, faith-centered homes.
Lead with Consistency and Authenticity
One of Pastor Ron’s core messages for dads is the importance of living out your values consistently. “We tried to live our life consistent with what we were telling our kids,” he shared, emphasizing that children pick up on hypocrisy quickly. Whether it’s faith, discipline, or family values, your actions speak louder than words. Pastor Ron’s own journey—from working at Marathon Oil to sales to pastoring—showed how his faith guided his parenting, even before he entered the ministry. He and his wife leaned on biblical principles and resources like Focus on the Family to raise their kids, always striving to model integrity.
For dads, this means being real about your faith and values. If you tell your kids to prioritize family, show it by putting down your phone during dinner. If you teach honesty, admit when you’re wrong and ask for forgiveness. Pastor Ron stressed, “Be honest about things… I think they see that it’s real to you.” Authenticity builds trust, and trust lays the foundation for your kids to follow your lead.
Discipline with Love, Not Fear
The conversation took a practical turn when discussing discipline, a topic many dads grapple with. Mr. Pancakes shared his frustration about differing parenting styles with his wife, particularly around physical discipline. Pastor Ron offered a balanced perspective: “I still believe in spanking. I don’t believe in beating, I believe in spanking… Whatever you do, it’s gotta hurt.” He clarified that “hurt” doesn’t always mean physical—it could be taking away privileges or enforcing consequences that sting enough to teach a lesson.
Importantly, Pastor Ron highlighted the need for parents to be united. “When parents aren’t together on something, children have a unique way of figuring that out,” he said. Kids will exploit divisions, so dads must work with their spouses to present a united front. Whether it’s setting boundaries around screen time or enforcing chores, consistency between parents reinforces authority and fosters respect.
Navigate Technology Wisely
Technology was a hot topic, with both hosts and Pastor Ron acknowledging its double-edged nature. While it enables connection—like the podcast itself, with E.a. Maynard in Virginia, Mr. Pancakes in Florida, and Pastor Ron in Ohio—it also poses risks. “It’s designed to make them angry and focus and want more of it; it’s addictive,” E.a. Maynard noted about kids’ exposure to platforms like YouTube. Pastor Ron agreed, emphasizing the need to teach self-control: “When you teach them to use it a certain period of time, you’re teaching them discipline.”
For dads, this means setting clear boundaries around technology use while leveraging its benefits. Pastor Ron praised programs like LifeWise Academy, which uses community spaces to teach kids the Bible, showing how technology and local initiatives can support faith-based parenting. He also cautioned about the flood of information online, urging dads to measure everything against a standard of truth, like the Bible, to discern what’s trustworthy.
Build a Family Constitution
Mr. Pancakes shared an inspiring initiative from his nonprofit, the American Liberty Foundation: a “family constitution.” This downloadable template, available at traditionalsociety.com, helps families define their values and standards. “It sets standards throughout the course of your life,” he explained, offering a way to recenter when life pulls you off track. Pastor Ron resonated with this idea, noting that it aligns with biblical principles of living intentionally and passing down values to the next generation.
Dads can take this concept and run with it. Sit down with your spouse and kids to outline what your family stands for—whether it’s faith, hard work, or respect—and refer back to it during tough moments. It’s a practical tool to keep everyone aligned and focused on what matters most.
Stay Connected, Even Without a Church
E.a. Maynard raised a concern many dads face: finding a trustworthy church. Having been “kicked out” of churches for asking questions, he expressed frustration with modern churches that stray from biblical teaching. Pastor Ron acknowledged the challenge, noting a shortage of pastors and the rise of megachurches that may prioritize numbers over substance. His advice? Keep searching for fellowship, even if it’s outside traditional church walls. “We might be looking at more home churches,” he suggested, where small groups meet to pray and study together.
For dads without a local church, this is a call to action. Connect with like-minded families, start a Bible study via Zoom, or explore online resources from trusted ministries like New Hope Wayne (NewHopeWayne.Church). Pastor Ron emphasized the need for community: “You need the encouragement… the need for fellowship and learning.” Even if it’s just you and one other dad, sharing the journey strengthens your resolve.
Grandparents: Influence, Don’t Overstep
As a grandfather, Pastor Ron offered wisdom for dads navigating relationships with their own parents. He and his wife homeschooled their grandchildren until they entered school, but they always respected boundaries: “We’re the grandparent, not the parent.” He cautioned against the trend of grandparents spoiling kids, which can undermine parental authority. Mr. Pancakes echoed this, sharing how he firmly tells his grandmother, “Absolutely not,” when she tries to overindulge his daughter.
Dads, communicate clearly with grandparents about your rules—whether it’s limiting candy or screen time. Pastor Ron noted that affluence makes spoiling easier today, but “just because you have the money doesn’t mean you should do it.” A respectful but firm approach ensures grandparents remain positive influences without crossing lines.Keep Faith at the Center
Above all, Pastor Ron urged dads to make faith real for their kids. “Pray with them. Be honest about things,” he advised, sharing how he and his wife used devotionals and Bible studies to guide their children. Mr. Pancakes described his family’s nightly routine of reading a devotions Bible with his daughter, which fosters spiritual growth and bonding. These small, consistent acts—praying at dinner, reading Scripture before bed—anchor kids in faith, even in a world full of distractions.
For dads worried about their kids’ salvation, especially without a church, Pastor Ron’s encouragement to keep seeking God and community offers hope. “God still sees people that have a need,” he said, trusting that God meets families where they are.
Take Action Today
Pastor Ron’s insights boil down to this: be intentional, be consistent, and lean on faith. Here are three practical steps dads can take right now:
- Create a Family Mission Statement: Visit traditionalsociety.com to download the family constitution template and define your family’s values with your spouse and kids.
- Set Tech Boundaries: Limit screen time to teach discipline, and use resources like YouTube selectively for educational content, like Mr. Pancakes’ daughter’s favorite, Aquanauts.
- Connect with Others: If you lack a church, reach out to one other dad or family to start a weekly Bible study or prayer group, in person or online.
Pastor Ron’s conversation reminds us that fatherhood is a calling—one that requires grit, grace, and a reliance on God. As he put it, “You don’t get two shots at it.” So, dads, let’s make every moment count.
Catch the full episode at callwithdads.com, and explore Pastor Ron’s ministry at NewHopeWayne.Church. For more resources on traditional parenting, visit pancakeswithyourdad.com and traditionalsociety.com.
